Self Criticism & How To Overcome It

It seems as though, the more insight we have, the more self critical we are. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think that’s what insight is meant to be about. Self criticism can look like many things, but oftentimes it’s a feeling that we are not enough, that we’re not doing enough and that the work we are doing isn’t good enough.

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While being too critical of yourself can stem from different places in your life’s experiences, the true question is how to overcome it? 

Step 1: Appreciating the Process

Because we live in a fast-paced society and often try to get from zero to a 100 as efficiently as possible, we don’t always see the value, growth and opportunity the PROCESS provides. This way of living causes us to lose sense of how far we have come, allowing the perfect opportunity for self criticism to creep in. 

My suggestion is to take a step back and evaluate

Are you comparing your path to someone else’s? 

Are you comparing your journey to someone else’s end results? 

Sometimes a journey worth taking may result in one step forward and two steps back. And that’s OK! Rather than getting overly critical of the step back, what if you started to see this step as an opportunity for a new perspective? Find the insights from your second time around. Appreciate the process.

Step 2: Your Journey May Not Look Like Anyone Else’s 

From someone who used to seek business advice from everyone except myself, I have learned the lesson that my path is my own, the hard way. 

For a long time I wanted to replicate the process of people who had more experience than me,  more ‘success’ than me, thinking that their way was the right way. Even though they were successful in their own ways, this type of accomplishment didn’t feel right for me. I felt off balance and my energy was drained. But I kept pushing trying to match my journey to theirs. 

It wasn’t until I started to honor my own journey and my own unique path that I started to be truly successful and happy as well! 

The truth is, the path you take should be the one that feels right for YOU, regardless of whatever path someone else might be taking to get to the same end result. 

We each have our own unique ways. Some of us are visual learners, some of us are aural learners, some of us verbal, and so on. When we consider this further, we realize that the path won’t look the same for all of us and it’s not meant to. 

Rather than focusing on the path, focus on your own codes so that you can appreciate your process and become less self critical of yourself! 

Step 3: Put CELEBRATION On Your To Do List

You read it right, CELEBRATION should be on your to do list, not just when overcoming self criticism, but on daily action steps! 

Why?

CELEBRATION is such an impactful practice towards growth! If you start to celebrate your small wins, small takeaways, small achievements, small steps, you are that much likely to keep cultivating success. 

In celebration you will evoke feelings that feel good, that feel fun, and this will make you appreciate and love the process even more. When you allow yourself to feel good and proud, you are also very likely to be less self critical. 

Step 4: Start Now!

While I know that it’s very tempting to wait until Monday, or until everything aligns, I am going to tell you that you will never be completely ready, and therefore you might as well start NOW! 

While constructive feedback can serve us well, self criticism will only keep us small. There’s no place for it in your journey, or anyone else’s. 

So next time these thoughts creep in, I’d suggest to take a step back and remember that you need to appreciate the process, follow your own path, and celebrate all of your big and small wins, as well as obstacles that provide lessons along the way. 

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